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Happiness: It’s a Jungle Out There

Topic: Beliefs & Attitudes

Author:
Sue Birkam (Click on authors name for bio)

Posted: Tuesday, May 31st 2011

When we attempt to leave our comfort zone and go out into the jungle every day, it can really be a challenge to maintain our sense of well being and happiness.

This prayer sets the tone for the rest of this post:

Dear God,

So far today, I’ve done all right, I haven’t gossiped, haven’t lost my temper, haven’t been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or over indulgent. I’m very thankful for that.  But in a few minutes, God, I’m going to get out of bed. And from then on, I’m probably going to need a lot more help.–Anonymous

In the past, my life view was that of a dangerous jungle. I was on alert for bad attitudes around me, crazy drivers who cut me off in traffic, injustice at work and within my family, slights on behalf of friends or co-workers, eye rolls from others, condescending tones of voice, people who were rude and basically on guard for snakes, lions, tigers and bears. And I found them. Does this sound odd? Some people call it having a chip on your shoulder; others might view it as victimization. I call it putting my happiness in the hands of someone else or giving away my happiness.

•So how do you create a safer jungle, one that won’t rob you of your happiness?
•How do you protect yourself from potential energy draining people?
•How do you manage to conquer the jungle with a smile on your face?
PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT

The answer for me was practice and more practice. Happiness is really up to you. By realizing you have no control over others is PRACTICE NUMBER ONE. You can’t control other people and their poor attitude. You can only pay attention to your response to that poor attitude. You can’t control erratic and unsafe drivers. Yelling and calling them names is ineffective because I have yet to see anyone who has successfully changed someones driving ability on the road through gestures and face making. I’m chuckling because I’ve tried this and it doesn’t work.  You can learn to explore your  feelings of injustice by examining your  interpretation of the circumstance surrounding that feeling, It is really only you who defines it.  Condescending people have struggles with their own worth, they must put themselves on higher ground in order to feel more confident and worthy, and again it’s your opportunity to redefine it for yourself.

PRACTICE NUMBER TWO is to expect happiness and you’ll receive it. Expect a pleasant day and you will attract it . Will people attempt to rain on your happiness parade? They may, but if you start your day with expectations of happiness and remind yourself if you see a storm looming that your entitlement is happiness, you can weather it. If you encounter that storm and before reacting you give yourself a moment to breathe, it can make a difference in maintaining your happiness.  Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth, this has a very calming effect. If you remember to breathe you can actually imagine breathing in happiness. Notice how when you get upset or stressed your breathing is either shallow or rapid and sometimes we forget to breathe altogether. When you breathe it creates a centering effect , give it a try right now. Breathing also supplies you with a moment  so that you can get centered and choose to respond to the storm rather than react.

PRACTICE NUMBER THREE is to set your intention to keep your happiness today. When you allow others to rob you of your happiness you become their victims. There are people in the jungle who spend their time attempting to steal your happiness. They more than likely aren’t happy themselves. Happy people have a great energy and vibrate it outward; those who aren’t happy are attracted to happy people’s energy like a moth to a light. They want to feed off that energy and transfer their problems over to you; it’s really a cosmic vibration from which they are sensing and feeding .

Have you ever encountered someone and then remarked “I got a bad vibe” from that person”?  They may have not said a word to you, perhaps they are just in the same room as you. You may not even know this person but you can sense something is amiss.  When this occurs you are reading their aura or energy. Becoming a Reiki Master and practitioner as well as my coach training have taught me two great methods of protection. Using your own energy you can create a protective light or shield by envisioning a white or purple light surrounding you, prior to or during an encounter with an unhappy person. You can still remain friendly but with this light you cannot be drained of your happiness energy.

Another technique I have learned in my coach training is to create bigger boundaries. When you come to realize that your energy is precious and so is your happiness, you will protect it and treasure it.  If you know in advance that you will encounter those who drain your energy you can make an agreement to limit the time you spend with them. Picture an imaginary circle, the circle is the space you need around you. No one can enter the circle unless you give them permission. You control who gets to step into this space and who does not. This is your happiness space.

Practice makes perfect. If you start your day with a few tools for creating and keeping your happiness in your personal jungle you will succeed. It takes daily intention setting along with daily practice before before it becomes your new beautiful habit.  Then observe how your life changes as a result. You will begin to notice things just aren’t as difficult any more. People are nicer; those who wanted to steal your joy suddenly find other things to talk about, even your driving experience in the jungle will change. We are energetic beings who vibrate out to the world our happiness or sadness. It’s really  up to you the type of experience you really want to create for yourself.

My coaching practice is dedicated to those who are WILLING to step past victimization and realize their full potential for happiness. If you are ready, I offer a twenty minute no strings attached complimentary coaching session. I also offer long distance Reiki along with coaching for a more enhanced experience  if you choose. Contact me to schedule your complimentary session. Or visit the assessment page for three free self assessments that will assist you in learning more about yourself and your environment. Until next time, choose happy.

Sue Birkam
Freedom Life Coaching Company
"Living to your fullest potential"
www.freedomlifecoachingcompany.com

(586) 855.0915  Local
877.97. Free-1   Toll Free Voice Mail
Email: sbirkam@gmail.com
or Sue@freedomlifecoachingcompany.com
Twitter @beingswell

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