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The Put On

Topic: Singles Humor

Fred Gansky (Click on authors name for bio)

Posted: Saturday, July 3rd 2010

I've gotten very interesting letters from women on Internet dating sites. This recent E mail probably has been one of the best. If nothing else, this woman has certainly convinced me that she has a wonderful sense of humor.

I went to Wal-Mart yesterday to purchase dog food. While I was in line to check out, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog (?).

On impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete, so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention that practically everyone in line was enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned. I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt and a car hit me.

I thought the guy was going to need help as he laughingly staggered to the door. It was hard to keep a straight face.

Have a wonderful holiday weekend!!

Let's chat soon, I bet I can keep you laughing!!

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